Friday, December 17, 2004

DPS- Dispiriting Public Spanish Inquisition

What's this about the DPS school scandal that's kept everyone fascinated for so long....

I mean I go to an aunt's place the other day and she decries "these things", that modern young people are upto nowadays.

Excuse me! But should I construe from that statement,"that you never ever did it in Life" ( to quote the actual girl in the DPS piece).

Surprisingly I'd think that they never ever have. Whatever else may be blooming in India, Indian hypocrisy regarding something as mundane and silly as sex hasn't certainlly undergone any change at all. It's quite depressing really. I mean, we give our kids potty training. Why not some sex education too.

But what really amazes me is the hoopla surrounding it. So, two kids in school engaged in a little something, that in a better age or time would have got each of them about two hundred lines, and a little more sense. Instead of treating the situation with the little maturity that you'd think a principal would bring to the proceedings, there was a kneejerk reaction, and the principal threw both kids out of school. For What? Because they had sex? Or because the guy actually distributed the video? Or was it actually because the girl had the guts to actually make that little quip to the princi?

Pretty dumb if you ask me. What was necessary was a little bit of careful counselling and perhaps a tight one across the guy's face ( I mean a slap here). Instead they were both expelled because the school's reputation had ostensibly been damaged and it's morals corrupted. Oh! Yes. Sweet little boys and girls don't indulge in anything like this. They all reproduce due to osmosis. Oh, come on! It still surprises me as to why something as important for life as sex is still treated in such a parochial way. Seems to me to be some kind of Victorian hang over.

To top it all, the principal next banned cell phones in school. Why????

It makes no sense at all. If they were thrown out for indulging in a sexual orgy, was the cellphone instrumental in causing that orgy?

Did the boy and girl stick it into each other?

Can you stop two people from having sex by making sure they don't have cellphones?

Is the school afraid that this would start off a trend of students selling pornographic videos of each other?
I am clueless to see how the school could prevent this by preventing students from getting cellphones to school. Believe me, there is no place more inconvenient for having sex than a school toilet, with it's lingering smell of phenoyl hanging about in the air. Kids today are much more intelligent and they could very well hike back to their own place, and indulge in a little "tiffin", tape it and sell it on the internet. What is the school going to do about it? Go into their houses and monitor them? By the way, from what I know the whole act did not take place in the school toilet (clue: there's a freaking big music set in the background. I have seen strange stuff, but a music system in a school toilet??? ). So why is the school kicking up such a delicious fuss about what did not technically take place on it's property? And more so to the point, how or why does it think banning cellphones is going to discourage people from having sex in their homes or places, clipping it and sending off copies to friends, family and relatives???? Expelling the students is a little extreme, but the school is well within it's right to exercise that privillege (very stupid of it, but excusable). But to ban cellphones is just freaking big time dumb. And all this from a school which is supposed to teach rational independent thought. Well, thank you so much.

Print media and others have gone overboard too. The Hindu, most "venerated and respected of print newspapers", can't have enough of sensationalizing stuff. There's a centre page spread on social evils of cellphones. And this case is their primary example. Excuse me! But the entire print media is based on the printing press, which was almost banned by the Church because for quite a long time it was used almost exclusively to print pornographic stuff.

And then the police and a few other bigwigs go about and arrest the CEO of Bazee and an IITian for no other reason other than that he allowed the damn thing to be sold on his site, and the dumb dick from IIT put it up. This despite the Legal Agreement when you bid at Bazee, that Bazee is not legally responsible for what is sold on it's site. The IITian in fact technically did peddle pornographic material so he could go to jail, but the other guy was an auction house for God's sake! But then rationality and the Indian police don't go well together. I am suspecting the unseen hand of the girl's father (a rather high flying army officer from what I have heard), to prevent the stuff from reaching a wider audience, but he's only making it worse for himself and his daughter.

Meanwhile all the newspapers have a circus to write about, and invite willing and top notch colmnists to write their opinion pieces about morality, forgetting that the two main parties are minors. They're kids damnit!!! They are entitled to planting their own wild seeds. Don't make it even more difficult for them.

All in all it's a little disquieting when you realize that there are no respectable Indian print houses but a lot of old graying yellow ones that would love to sensationalize even the smallest of man looses shirt pieces to sell more. They have the core values of CNN but rather more endearingly speak of Indian values.

What a bunch of incompetent hacks!!!!


B.t.w. who else is sick of India's tour of Bangladesh. I am all for good cricket, but when you have a bunch of minnows like Bangladesh and then Dravid hits another century, things look a little uneven. But the newspapers are delighted. They are all talking of a masterful century and all that, but fail to report that it's off a group of players who are amateurish at best, and are bowling the kind of tripe young trainees at the Academy bowls to the visiting team at nets and a pitch that is so flat it looks like an ironing board. Excuse me, but a century against Bangladesh on a flat track, in a two test series is not as glorious as you make it out to be.
I don't know what they are playing at, but it's certainlly not cricket.


Was watching it on ESPN or something and Sourav Ganguly was batting. The ball was a fast one but was bowled not at middle stump or even at Ganguly's ribs, but nicely angled across Ganguly and a feet outside of offstump. Ganguly impetuously thrust out his foot, and crashed his bat into the ball and sent it through the offside field, between two fielders who couldn't believe that the bowler was bowling this ball the fourth time this over and then began a long chase after the ball. Not surprisingly it was a four. Ravi Shastri or Harsha Boghle or someone mumbled inanely, "The trick to that shot was that he didn't hit it too hard. Wonderful offside player Ganguly". Times like these, I wish we had Boycott back at the mike. I can just hear his drawl.

"Aw no Harsha, the trick to that shot was that the bowler deserves to have his head examined. He's done the same thing four times this over, and once more now. Surely my old mother could have done better than that".

Chennai has been having a cold spell. Which means that the temperature is 24 degrees instead of the customary 32. So people are dressed in sweaters (the turtleneck variety) and a jacket. Chap came into office in a sweater and was talking to one of my friends (the voice over IP buisness).

Chap-It's a little cold here.
Friend-Really? How much?
Chap-24 degrees.
Friend-Centi or Faren.
Chap-Centi? How is it there.
Chap-Centi or Faren.
Friend-Faren you nitwit!!!